Adulthood

Yesterday I did some laundry, and actually matched my socks. Is this what adulthood feels like?

Birthday

Momma Lu's birthday is coming up, and at this point it feels like there is only one gift she wants from me: a grandchild.

Thought Jots

Saw a blind woman today, she needed to touch up her dye job. Is it my place to tell her?

I am going to relax so hard on Saturday I may not stand up.

I am wearing headphones, no sound is emanating from them.

I had coffee this morning. Crazy-head-town-space.

AND FOR THE RECORD, YOU ARE WONDERFUL.

I am not just saying that, I mean it. Thank you for taking the time to read this right now. There is not enough time in the world to get everything done. I mean you probs have something much better to be doing right now. Just take a second and think of it.

Yet here you are, sitting at your computer reading this.

What a waste of time. I feel wasteful even typing this.

Yet here I am, continuing to type. And there you are continuing to read.

Is there a moment in there that you were thinking "She can't prove I am reading this."

I don't have to prove anything........

Where I am at right now

At this point in the day all I want to do is quote lines from Real Housewives of New Jersey with someone.

"Prostition whore!"

"Engaged 19 times!"

"Pay attention. Puh-lease."

"Let me tell you a-something about my family. We are as thick as thieves."

Give me a call if you wish to do the same thing.

Bone to pick

"I just threw up a little in my mouth."

Really genius? Do you usually throw up out of other places?

Cut the redundancy.

Morning time

Yesterday morning I took a long time getting ready because I had an attack of "I don't have anything to wear."

This morning I took a long time getting ready because I locked myself out on the balcony.... in my robe. Sweet Boyfriend had to come from work to let me back into the house.

I just wanted to talk to my plants a little and get some fresh morning air, terrible idea.

Also, there's a chance that I thought Michael Jackson's song, Man in the Mirror, was Man in the Middle.

Yup, I am that person who gets lyrics very wrong. But I that doesn't stop me from singing them proudly. And believe you me, I have quite the singing voice.

Elevator

I have changed jobs again, and I am back to taking the elevator.

I take it to the 5th floor, and when people get in and they are just going to floor 2 or 3 I pretend to get annoyed... In my head I grumble and roll my eyes. I don't do it in real life because I am scared of everything. But in my head I am totes a movie-cliche popular girl.

Just now, in the elevator was me and a girl going to the 7th floor. And I could feel her huffing and shuffling her papers and being annoyed. Not in real life, but like her head communicating to my head.

Also, I don't usually drink sodas, but sometimes I have an ice cold Coca Cola Classic as a pick me up. Today I needed a pick me up. I know my boss right now doesn't drink soda. So when she came over to talk to me I kind of hid my Coca Cola.

I have people pleasing issues.

The girl in the cube behind me is going on a trip (I know because shes talking on the phone about it). She's bringing curling rollers, a flat iron, a curling iron, and tons of hairspray.

Mouth v. Butt

Warning, this is going to about my bowel movements. Why? Because it just is.

My mouth seems to have some sort of axe to grind with my butt. All the foods I crave are spicy and delicious, and fall out of my butt a few hours after eating them.

Indian food and Mexican food seem to be the main culprits. But chances are if it's ethnic and spicy I will love it and want to eat it everyday.

This is all for now, email questions for more detail about my schedule, consistency, and coloring.

Movie Reviews of Movies that Everyone has Already Seen But Me

Chronicles of Narnia

Overall: Very exciting. Lot's of action. Cute beavers. It's sad when the animals die though. I like lions!

Highlight: When I got so scared that I jumped and shook up my beer so it exploded all over me and Boyfriend

Lowlight: When it was scary.

Cougar moment: I am excited to see what the oldest son actor looks like in a few year. My prediction = gorgeous.

Happy Feet

Overall: Scary! Why do they make that seal so scary? I couldn't barely sit still. Cute animals!

Highlight: DANCING! And singing!!!

Lowlight: Scariness! How can little kids watch this?

Cougar moment: Those penguins looked tasty, too bad we don't co-habitat.

A new good diet by Karen Hamburger

Only get food that you think you like, but the last time you had it you didn't like it.

It's a good diet because you don't like this food. And purchasing it and nothing else guarantees you won't eat much lunch.

For me today, that means: carrot soup.

Dream

I'll make this short because, trust me I get it, other people's dreams can be boring. (See blog post about dreams being like drunk stories, ie not interesting unless you are in them (See me being too lazy to link))

Anywhoozle, I had a dream I was flying on a spaceship, but it was like totes casual. Just for a vacay we would fly in spaceships. And there was a slide on spaceship, and I remember during the dream thinking "Now this whole trip is cool. But this slide, I am going to blog about this slide."

And I did.

Meeting

Got huge laughs in a meeting today....

By explaining how to make this cabbage salad I really like.

I didn't really get it, but a laughs a laugh.